Resources

If You Have Been Sexually Assaulted

What do I do if I have been sexually assaulted?  (Click to expand)

Medical Care Following Sexual Assault - Your Health Is Important
We encourage survivors to receive medical attention soon after a sexual assault. Even if there are no visible signs of injury, you may have internal damage, been exposed to sexually transmitted infections, and/or been impregnated. Please note that receiving medical care is a separate and confidential process from reporting to police.

You can receive medical care at a doctor's office, a health clinic, or from the hospital based program at the Sexual Assault/Domestic Violence Treatment Centre (SA/DVTC) accessed through the Emergency Department at St. Mary's Hospital in Kitchener or Cambridge Memorial. Ask for the SA/DVTC nurse on call.The SA/DVTC can be contacted at 519-749-6994.

If you want support before going to the hospital, or if you'd like a volunteer from our Centre to accompany you there, call our 24 Hour Support Line (519-741-8633).

Sexual Assault/Domestic Violence Treatment Centre (SA/DVTC)
The SA/DVTC offers comprehensive care, addressing emergency medical, forensic, emotional, and social needs, for survivors of recent sexual or domestic violence assault. For more information please visit their website. 

Sexual Assault Evidence Kit
While receiving medical care from the SA/DVTC, you may choose to undergo a Sexual Assault Evidence Kit, a medical exam that collects evidence of the sexual assault, which may be used in a police investigation. The kit can be stored in confidence at the hospital for up to six months (after which it will be destroyed), as the survivor decides whether or not to report the assault and release the kit.

If you are thinking about undergoing a Sexual Assault Evidence Kit, take note that:
The sexual assault must have happened recently. Evidence can sometimes be collected a week after an assault, but ideally evidence should be collected within 48-72 hours. You should avoid, if possible - showering or bathing, changing your clothes, eating or drinking, and going to the bathroom - as these activities limit the amount of evidence that can be collected.

Legal Options Following Sexual Assault
Your Decision to Report
Reporting the sexual assault is a decision each survivor must make for her/him self. Reporting may not be part of your healing path. For survivors who decide to report, it is important to remember that support can help you through this very trying process.

To make an appointment to report a sexual assault to the police, please call the Special Investigations Unit at the Waterloo Regional Police Service at 519-570-9777. 

If you want support before reporting or an accompaniment to the police station, call our 24 Hour Support Line.

If You Decide to Report, You Have the Right to...

• Get immediate medical care after reporting the sexual assault to the police, if you have not received care yet. Please note that the police can be contacted while or after receiving care from the Sexual Assault/Domestic Violence Treatment Centre at the hospital.
• Be treated with courtesy, compassion, and respect for your personal dignity and privacy. 
• Request the police officer who will take your statement be of the same gender as you. Describe what happened in your own words without interruption. 
• Ask for the discussions to take place in a more private location. 
• Ask for clarification of any question or the purpose of any question. 
• Take a break from questioning. 
• Have an interpreter, if your first language is not English. 
• Have communication and/or transportation assistance, if you have a disability. 
• Make a complaint about the police if you're unhappy with the way you were treated. 
• Have a supporter accompany you to the police station (call our 24 Hour Support Line to arrange for an accompaniment to the police station).​

Resource Guide
A beautiful Resource Guide shared with us from a sister-centre: Durham Rape Crisis Centre.

Download Resource Guide

If Your Loved One Has Been Sexually Assaulted

How do I support a loved one?  (Click to expand)

Suggestions for Partners, Friends, and Family Members:
If someone close to you, whether a friend, family member, or romantic partner has been sexually assaulted, you are going through a very painful experience. In many ways, you're going through the trauma with them and in other, very lonely ways, you are going through your own pain while they are going through theirs in ways that leaves you feeling very much on the outside of their world.
This page is intended to offer you support and guidance as you both work to put as many of the pieces of your life back together as possible. This page also aims to remind you that you, too, may need support and to make you aware of the resources available to help you move through the difficult emotions and intrusive images that are probably haunting you.

Validate Their Experience:
The first and most important step in helping someone you love who has been sexually assaulted is to validate their experience. The most fundamental example of this is simply that you believe them about what happened. Often, the sheer reality of someone you love having suffered an assault is so overwhelming that you immediately shift to a line of thinking that can make it seem less true. "Are you sure?" "Did you lead them on?" "Maybe they just didn't realize...." All of these things are the psychological equivalent of "Why don't you go be by yourself with all these painful things?" Most loved ones would never want to convey such a message, but it's important to know the subtle ways in which that very message is delivered. It is important to remind the person who suffered a sexual assault, maybe even repeatedly, that it was not their fault, no matter what the circumstances of the assault. Nobody, under any circumstances, ever has the right to do something sexual that the other person doesn't want to do.

Invite the Pain and Hurt With Them:
Your being willing, able, and strong enough to listen and be compassionate are what they need most. They are in, perhaps, the loneliest place they/ve ever been. Don't minimize their feelings or tell them to "put it behind them and move on" because that, in effect, tells them to get rid of something they can't get rid of and they'll simply be more alone. Pain goes away when people tend to it. Ignored pain gets infected when people simply try to cover it up, and "put it behind them". Remind them that they're not alone and that you will be there with them. This might involve you reminding yourself and them that, as much as it hurts, you have the strength to help them carry this pain. Such reminders are important because an added difficulty for them is that they are now causing you a lot of pain. Acknowledging this while asserting your strength to handle it reminds them that they, too, have the strength in spite of the pain. It's important that you realize what you're offering and only offer what you can. Otherwise, you risk doing something that most loved ones do, which actually adds to her pain: trying to push the pain down. Without realizing it, you'll start changing the subject when they bring it up, trying to keep things superficial, or even avoiding them. If you feel unable to handle it all, offer to connect them to more objective support. For example, offer to go with them to get professional support. Consider getting some counseling for yourself to help you manage the pain you feel about someone you loved suffering the trauma of sexual violence.

Empower Them: 
After validating their experience, the most important goal is to empower them. Usually, the best way to be helpful around this aspect of their healing is to keep a close eye on ways in which you might disempower them--- and avoid those things. Keep in mind that the most emotionally damaging aspect of sexual assault is that one's sense of personal power and control was completely taken away for a traumatic period of time. It is very important, therefore, that they feel in control of their own recovery. Don't push them to do things they don't want to do or are not yet ready to do. For example, don't apply pressure for them to press criminal charges, tell their parents, etc. Definitely do not tell anyone about the assault without their expressed and involved cooperation. Similarly, if you know the person who committed the assault, do not assume a vigilante stance and confront or attack this person on their behalf. They then have to deal with their own pain and any additional complications that arise from your confronting somebody without them asking you to.

Help Them Tell You What They Need: 
Sharing the pain of sexual assault can be a very confusing time. You may not know, at any given time, what the person you are trying to support needs. Ask them. They may be able to simply say what they need. Other times, they may have a clear sense of what they need. One idea is to plan ahead and identify the needs ahead of time so they only need to be recognized rather than clearly articulated. For example, such needs may include: Support and Company; Space and Solitude; Gentle Affection and Being Held For Support; Platonic Affection and to Not Be Touched.

Self-Care: 
Finally, take care of yourself. Recognize that you too, have been affected by the trauma and will have feelings and reactions. In many ways, you will cycle through the same kinds of psychological experiences as the person who was assaulted. For periods of time, you will be in denial, even forgetting that it happened. At other times, you will feel haunted by intrusive thoughts, images, and feelings. It is also normal for you to go through a range of other reactions. At times you may blame yourself and feel guilty, powerless, inadequate, angry that you have to deal with this, or you may become overly protective or controlling, and even resent your responsibilities as a support person. While it may be wise to keep some of these feelings from the person you're trying to support, remember the feelings don't make you "bad". They simply make you human. Remember to be as much of your complete self as possible. Stay invested in the interests and passions that you had before this trauma occurred. Don't limit your contacts with other friends, activities, and alone time to the degree that you lose yourself in this trauma. Not only does this self-care help you to remain a stable support person, it helps the person you're supporting to see that they are not as much of a burden to you as they might fear they are.
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Help Is Available.
Keep in mind, services at SASC may help you work through some of your struggles so that you can be even stronger and clearer in your supportive role. If they are in counseling, offer to attend with them if they and their counselor think that might be helpful. If they are not in counseling, let them know about the services.

Emergency Resources for Survivors

Sexual Assault Support Centre of Waterloo Region
Our Centre's 24 Hour Support Line is available 365 days a year. Call us at (519) 741-8633.

Please note: The services listed below are additional resources that are available in our community for survivors of sexual violence. Please connect with our Centre at 519-571-0121 or email [email protected] to learn more about the services we offer, including:​

• Individual counselling (in-person, online, and via phone)
• Group counselling, workshops and drop in
• Support for women dealing with the family court system
• Support for survivors of human trafficking
• Practical assistance
• and more

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Care Path for Survivors of Sexual Exploitation in Waterloo Region
Are you a survivor of sexual exploitation? Do you need help finding care and support? We can help. This interactive resource from SART (Sexual Assault Response Team) will help you find the care you need. ​

Download a PDF version by clicking here:

Download

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Women's Crisis Services of Waterloo Region
​Women’s Crisis Services of Waterloo Region empowers and supports women and children to move beyond violence and abuse through the provision of safe shelter, education and outreach services.

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Sexual Assault/Domestic Violence Treatment Centre (Hospital-based Program) 
This program provides immediate support after a sexual assault, domestic violence, or human trafficking.

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Special Victim's Unit – Waterloo Regional Police Service
This unit responds to sexual assaults and human trafficking in our community.

Immediate Mental Health Supports

Counselling Walk-In Clinics for people needing immediate support:

 Camino Wellbeing + Mental Health
Walk in and single session counselling available Tuesdays and Thursday from noon to 6 p.m. For more information, visit this webpage.

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Porchlight Counselling + Addiction Services
Walk-in counselling services available. For more information, please call: 519-621-5090

Support Across Ontario

Ontario Coalition of Rape Crisis Centres
To access support across Ontario, visit the website for the Ontario Coalition of Rape Crisis Centres.